How to Put It Behind It You…Or Just Move On…or Man Up…Or Get Over It, Already
One of the things you quickly come to realize about college life is that it’s not abuzz with useful advice. A lot of things can suddenly transform that carefree life into a situation where the most precious thing to be found is good advice. Unfortunately, what often passes for helpful advice when you are brooding over a bad grade, an unexpected breakup or the sudden realization that you have no interest at all in pursuing a career you’ve been preparing for three and a half years comes down to the most glib, meaningless and unhelpful counsel possible.
Is it really possible to simply move on or to wake up tomorrow and just get over it? Or is the advice to just get over it already really just code for “I’m sick of hearing about it.” As for man up…you don’t even need to be a girl for that advice to be as useless as a fact checking department at the Fox News Channel.
Just because the problem you are having happens to be related to life during college does not automatically disqualify it from serious contemplation. Nor does it qualify your college buddies from actually taking more than a second to think before advising you.
The high intensity world of college preparing you for a business environment in America that is growing increasingly more hostile to the non-executive worker is a world where one bad grade can send you into a tailspin. As for relationship issues, why should college be any different from high school or the office or the suburbs or the farm or the military base or, well, you get the idea.
Just get over it, already? How about some actually useful advice on how to deal with a professor seemingly intent on destroying your GPA? Or a coach who doesn’t realize you actually do have a life?
The first step it to find something positive that keeps you from dwelling on the negative. The closer you can get to actually becoming obsessed doing something positive, the more likely you are to get away from obsessing over the negative. Aim for an obsession with movies, games, books, hobbies, social networking connections or anything else that doesn’t have the potential to drive you off course.
Another way to move on may sound as trite as the advice to just man up, except this advice really works. Really and truly make the effort to put things in their proper perspective. Talk to other students in your dorm, frat house or classroom. Log onto your favorite social networking site and find people who have been through the same thing. Support some local indie bands, especially if they have a positive message or relatable lyrics. Music has an amazing ability to transform even the worst mood. Consciously bring up memories where you thought the world was going to end because of a singular event only to realize that the world didn’t even come close to ending. One of the greatest tools at your disposal in figuring out how to get past something horrible is to learn the fine art of putting things in perspective.
It is a lesson that may very well stick with you longer than anything else you learn at college.